you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
she kept her crown on the whole time i was giving her birthday sex
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
I think rendering her infertile would be a valid community service project
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
How do you feel?
Like the devil himself shit me out, baked me into a pie, ate the pie, and shit me out again.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
About to be a 4Loko vomit fountain in 45 seconds, what color will it be? Animated birds will fly out of me.
I just bought a bong from a hot dog stand.
Randomize
