My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
How do you tell someone they are only invited if they put out?
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
Thats why you have fulfilling relationships with nice girls and i have kinky sex with crazies
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
Are we still banned from the library?
So I'm sitting at my desk and Thunderstruck came on my iPod. I then proceeded to drink coffee every time I heard thunderstruck. Who says you don't remember anything from college?
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
A stripper set a mans ass on fire... the club smelled like burning ass and boxers.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
