I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Well at least you learned that cops don't like when you call them frenchy. Nice dive over the fence by the way.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Apparently I took a selfie with fried chicken at 2 am....I'm still trying to figure out where I got the chicken. I thought I was making mac & cheese.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
It seems that Coffee is the true alpha male.
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
Randomize
