she's like the human form of herpes, as soon as you think she's gone for good you have another out break.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
Even my Russian and Serbian roommates think I drink to much.
Managed to get through family dinner without anyone knowing I was tripping balls. Christmas miracle. He exists.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
I found her face down on the kitchen floor asking anybody who walked by for Kraft Dinner
She just sent me a message. It's a poem, about eternal love, that she wrote, about us. Just because I took her home two nights - doesn't mean it's eternal love.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Randomize
