Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
I may or may not have just visibly given him head in front of three young children and their mom. They all looked mortified.
I think we should make a list of challenges so that when stuff like that happens, we can check it off. Like a scavenger hunt for hoes.
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
Well for starters, her tits were hairy.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I'm home now if you wanna come over.
Sloane just tried to lick my eyeball. I'm going to regain my composure then I'll be there.
When you woke up the first word out of your mouth was "whoa"
I was feeling the aftermath of his penis
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
Bad news man, we're gonna have to reschedule Golden Coral: The Musical
I don't know who the fuck this is, but right on man
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Randomize