problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
im guessing your the one that tried to make bacon in the toaster
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
Should we discuss the rug burns on my back or just save that for a separate conversation
We lit firecrackers from NYE in the fireplace and he was so passed out that he slept through it.
Just walked into a random hotel for the free breakfast. How was your night?
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
HOW DO YOU FORGET TO FINISH WINE
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
