We have sex, then he cooks. It's like a fantasy.
the only good thing about him lasting five minutes was that nobody thinks i had sex with him or that im a slut because we were only in the bathroom for five minutes
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
Just paid off my possession ticket on 4/20. Helloooo awesome.
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Some older looking guy gave me his card as he exited the train. Hes a pharmaceutical rep. I'm debating asking him for a job. Obv he wants sex but if I can get a job out of this maybe I can offer him more than a cheap dry handjob bc that's all I'm really up for these days
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I'm pretty sure I went in the girls bathroom and vomited everywhere then looked for a urinal for like 20 minutes
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
