I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
WHY IS THERE NO EMOJI FOR "FUCK MY MOM JUST SAW MY SEX BRUISES?!"
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I'm still home, my life isn't together. Currently drying my pants
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
