I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
you'd think he'd be slightly more humble with a penis that small
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
Nope, I'm sticking to passive aggressive punishments. Like mismatching his socks and cumming on his leather couch. OCD is so wonderful.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Well I accidentally flashed a 76 year old woman, i'm in a house full of republicans and Im almost drunk enough to give the gay rights speech so i'd say this wedding reception is going great
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Just a suggestion, don't apricot scrub your vagina.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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