Awww my brother is growing up soo fast!! He just gave me the, "I know you're high but I won't tell mom n dad" look!
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
PS- did you die? If you did just text "dead" to me, so that I know.
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
all of his pictures were taken on a library computer, how did you even consider fucking him?
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
That's cool. At least the punch line of my story isn't I shit in a booth at Denny's.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
She sent me a video of herself sitting in the car stone faced listening to the Titanic song on silence. She won't answer my texts.
you were acting out moves from the wwe, in a dress. then you sceamed "you can't see me" and ran out of the apt.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
