i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
i just made my mom cry by blowing spit bubbles.
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
grab my backpack.....its in the fridge
There's nothing like vomiting in the restroom at work to remind you that you're not in college anymore.
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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