How are you going to pay for strippers in Vegas when you were just begging for McDoubles?
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
She says I'm cute and I remind her of her brother. She's too hot to back out now. I don't know. I'm guna go for it.
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
A legendary roster of degenerates has been assembled.
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
