He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
Could you please tell them to stop whispering "thundercunt" every time I walk in the room?
It was her 21st and she had one drink and fell asleep. I hate 90lb girls.
Apparently blazed enough to think that the sizzling meatballs in the pan were calling your name...Ssssteeeeeve
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Rage-masturbating and then crying myself to sleep. Welcome to Wednesday.
He used his penis as a drumstick on my back and had me guess what song he was playing.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
Randomize
