Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
My gift to the freshman: I made an illegal stop, rolled out and dropped to my hands and knees and puked in front of the south campus dorms and about 20 families. Welcome to OSU
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
I'm at the laundry mat. This guy is here showing me his ankle monitor. The weird ones always find me.
I can handle NPR. I speak hippie. I took it in college.
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
You did profess your love for cotton multiple times and your hatred for all other fabrics
he wouldnt let me in bed until i took off all the stickers i was covered in
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
How did the date go? No fake eyeballs this time?
I'm sitting in Madison square park surrounded by children thanking god I took emergency contraception
We're on our way. We couldn't find our clothes this morning, so we're driving your car half naked. You owe me a cigarette.
Randomize
