Hey sorry about saying i hated you. it was the coke and the ice cream.
So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
So my Christmas cards this year will be my mug shot with my kids face photo shopped next to me....too ghetto?
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Wearing a shark mask, slugging tequilla, in cowboy boots, and not minding that my spandex is on backwards. What are you up to?
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
You KNOW it was a good night when you find French fries AND taco remnants in your bra when you get home...
you're telling me you don't want to have sex 30,000 feet above the earth?
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
Randomize