and you said cock pushups were impossible
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
Halloween has nothing on dressing up as as the INS on cinco de mayo
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Brandon's Recipe: two parts cocoa, one part sugar, one part milk, two parts four, 378 parts paranoia. Thanks for the fucking brownies, bitch.
He said I showed up in just my underwear and a bunch of towels I stole from the party I was at.
This chick had a microhand. Fucking, like, jerking off a baby carrot would make it look like corn.
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
I mean I know I'll get over it by like tonight but ew ew eww. I cannot. Dude I don't even know his name also I threw up on his penis
Woke up in the hospital naked with my id's taped to my chest. Also apparently puked on two guys, two girls and an escalade (at the same time). Good night.
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
Randomize
