I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I'm buying a pregnancy test with my lunch money. Classy.
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Ordered a large pizza and definitely just paid the cab driver in pizza slices. I'm glad there's someone out there that's just as fat at heart as we are.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
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