Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
i think he just broke into a bike shop his last text said something about hiding in some tree
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
...Just this whole adulting thing gets in the way of mermaid drag shows at lesbian bars.
i just teared up watching channing tatum in drag emerge from the fog on lip sync battle. it's gotta be PMS. either that or something is realllllly wrong with me.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
I'm fairly sure I accidentally saw my dad naked last night
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
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