Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
The last thing I remember is him grabbing my ass and telling me he knew where the jello shots were, so I followed him.
I know, it's just the worst. Also, security almost took the burrito I brought for lunch. I thought I was going to have to pull a Liz Lemon and eat the whole thing before I could go through.
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
I felt like a responsible adult. A responsible adult that may or may not end up shitfaced. But not heaving purple puke into a urinal like last time because I'm classy now.
No,she came up with a new game: "Where is the most interesting place I can show Drew my asshole?"
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Randomize