im poppin the ladies like they're bacne
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
And then he said "good night girls" and kissed each one before I put my shirt back on
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
He made me a mix cd. There is obviously something wrong with him.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
we have to top last new years. except im not ready for jail. that can wait a couple years
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
Remember that time i gave you head on MY birthday and you made me stop so you could watch the rhino part in 300
She needs more friends. Or a second therapist.
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
Randomize
