did you get engaged???
Its not drinking alone if you got Tiger on the Wii.
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
I'm trying to decide if I want to bring home my 'beer champion' trophy or my chem books.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
have you ever seen all dogs go to heaven this is important
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I don't know how a coffee date turned into road head. But hey
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
woke up and you werent here...its ok if we're never going to speak again but my furry hand cuffs are missing and i would like them back. thanks.
Randomize
