i just had 3 doubles lined up on top of a urinal, texting with one hand and my dick in the other. I an fucking awesome.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I have been drinking since 2. And I'm now chasing the cat around the house with a light saber. Anna's helping.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
he apologises profusely for spelling mistakes in his texts but doesn't care about cheating on me. priorities
Nothing more ironic than raw dogging some random Asian hottie last night and then doing the walk of shame home from her place mixed in with the participants of the AIDS walk
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Nothing like putting a Percocet up your nose because you spent your night drinking heavily and can't drink water to make you heavily reconsider your life choices
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
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