i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
New years is officially the only time its okay to drunk dial your parents.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Yeah things got weird. You ate an entire bag of hotdog buns, then tried to catch a tree on fire with a candle.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize
