YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
Today's lesson: while in the shower, one should choose between either drinking OR shaving. Not both.
Apparently he ran around last night saying he was 'the hulk hogan of muff diving'
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
They should have to wear some identification that warns you to stay away. Like one of those cones dogs wear to keep them from biting stitches. CONE OF SHAME.
holy shit i just had sex in a phone booth i so feel young again
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
Just fucked up my mustache shaving, gonna have to take it off because now it makes me look like a pedophile
FYI your old mustache made you look like a pedophile
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Do not buy a prego test at the Walgreens you frequent. It's awkward. Just trust me.
Randomize
