I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
You were great dude. You wanted to charge the guy with fedora $100 to get in.
It gives me purpose in life to help fulfill nerdy fantasies. Like I'm doing something good for mankind and having multiple orgasms in the process.
You are the only lesbian I know that needs plan b
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
Randomize
