It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
some drunk guy just paid $3 for each cig that i picked up off the ground. the cigs that he threw on the ground. I might just follow him the rest of the night
You left a trail of sequins from your dress incase we got lost
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I approve. Last time I was there, I left E's room to get a drink of water. Found M sitting on the kitchen counter in his boxers hammered and eating a banana. He proceeded to feed me the rest of his banana then went to bed with the lights on. You two will be great.
So good!! I became real good friends with an adorable black lesbian couple from Baltimore and a man in a diaper.
I need to find another hobby that doesn't include being hungover.
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
My friends got engaged today and I learned the techniques of going upside down on a stripper pole. I'm not really sure who won...
Let's just say, I'm pretty sure you're banned from Skype.... like, forever.
Randomize
