i was so high that i was eating crumbs of my bed only to realize they were fuzz thingies. fml.
Buying $100 worth of beef jerkey sounded like a terrific idea last night.
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
Looking for things to spread butter on. Found men's briefs in garbage can. Lost insurance card. Summer has finally arrived
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Sorry I can't pick up... thought process is fine but too stoned to form words.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
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