Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
So howd u manage to get high at a one year olds birthday anyway?
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
YOUR MANICOTTI IS FULL OF LIES
Sorry i meant to send that to my mom
Randomize
