he was on top of me and all of a sudden stopped and starting picking his nose...i asked him if he was okay, he sort of looked confused, and he told me he had a booger that hurt. guess its a good thing i wasnt planning on dating this guy
think im gonna go get a six pack before class and sit in the back of the room...
I just wasted my iTunes Gift Card on a season pass for Hannah Montana. Bad decision?
you asked a group of latinas stood by the bar to hold a minutes silence for ugly betty getting cancelled. that drunk.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
What vodka is american?
Skyy. I already looked it up for 4th of july.
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Randomize
