..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
she looked like the before picture.
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
Osama's death just kick started our Cinco de mayo celebration. Margaritas for anyone wearing red white and blue!
Who just wakes up in their own bed and assumes "I probably blew some guy last night"
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
And then my night got REAL pukey
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
