you were the first one he came out to and you announced it as the finale while singing karaoke at the bar
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
No flamethrowers. That is a direct order.
If sitting in the car passing a flask back and forth because the bar we go to is having some power issues on Christmas eve isn't Christmas spirit, then I don't know is.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I just had the worst experience of my life, my grandma found my condoms.
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
Thanks for making me a drunk burrito last night and cutting it into bite size pieces, I always knew you were a keeper.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
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