I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
Wow way to turn my death into an oppurtunity to get laid
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
well it can jab him in the chin so I am 100% sure he can suck his own dick
You said you liked how I put the cream cheese on.
My fridge is empty and all of my food is in the bathtub. Just.. Why?
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
& I came downstairs to find my whole family discussing the fact that I have a vibrator, which my mom found accidentally....
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