Pish posh, there's never a bad time to eat food off my body.
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
please come you make the beer taste better
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
what the fuck a piece of candy corn just came out of her nose
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
The beauty of his penis is distracting me from the fact that he was born after Princess Diana died
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