Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I wouldn't fuck her. Looks like her vagina smells like a seaside orgy.
Turns out I was the only one drinking. I broke one guy's bed and kicked another in the face. Then when an RA came by I shouted to let him in he's gonna find the vodka anyway. Great night
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
He keeps asking the karaoke guy to play let it go from frozen so he can sing it in a falsetto
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
Officially locked in my status as an indifferent millennial by downloading Tinder.
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Everyone else's "needs" are getting in the way of my alcoholism.
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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