The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
The nurse gave me a funny look when I said I thought I have an std in my throat. Bet she only does it missionary too
His fuck buddy just got fake tits and wants him to 'come break them in.' I need his life.
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Can you bring home bongs? Like all the bongs. I need bongs
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
it is my last wish that my tale be published posthumously as a warning to anyone thinking of eating burger king at nine am
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
Every dick I’ve had or wanted in the last year is married. It’s like I became a professional home wrecker after I graduated.
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