and then I told him he looked like the Gordon's Fisherman dude. I don't think he thought it was funny, because he 'forgot' to pay for my beer.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
My theory is if i keep drinking, evolution will kick in and I will grow a bigger, faster, and more improved liver by January.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
You should not be involved with someone who smells like that. Because that smell seriously does not go away. Even if you can't actually smell it at any given point, it will still haunt you
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