Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Too tired to do the dishes so I made mac and cheese in a teapot. There's still some left if you want some...
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
She brought me back a blanket from Mexico, then we had sex on it
He gives me the same feeling I get when someone puts a margarita or German chocolate cake in front of me
If you wake up with half a an eyebrow.... I'm pretty sure it was a good time.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
