I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
Have $25 to my name but it's $2 pitchers. I have no choice but to go.
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
speaking of graduation plans, i'm blacked out eating sausage
This is one of those moments when you do what I say or I come stalk you down like a gazelle.
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
My fuck buddy is great and all, but it gets weird when she gets in arguments with her BF in the driveway
I hope you have a dream of a sloth with my face touching you erotically
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
I just remember lots of butts and something about ranch dressing.
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Randomize