I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
It got kind of awkward when her dad brought home a 20 something asian girl at 3am
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
Apparently there was a point in the night that they literally thought he was dead, ass naked on the floor. That bad.
...Saturday night. Get your dick ready. We are going to go nuts. I want to have sex fucking everywhere.
I think they make you graduate because you get too old to go hard and become a risk. homecoming weekend wins again. fuck.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Not even a manhunt keeps my brother and his friends from the bars
Randomize
