I got chris browned last night
my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
Words i added to my t9 today: gnomes, facebook, and chlamydia.
i love rice pilaf. whoever invented that i would give them a hug.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
Improvement. She went from pretending she was the soccer ball in the world cup games and it hurt when they kicked her to passed out on the floor.
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
Please please please tell me that is not a pringles container full of pee that your little brother just got a hold of.....
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
I was just reelected president of justgotlaidsylvania
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
i cant go to his party cause last time i pressed the red buttons on the wall and the fire alarm went off for 40 minutes, i'm not allowed back there
Randomize
