she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
My arms are still sore. Apparently, lube wrestling is the best workout ever.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
He wore socks while I was giving him head. I couldn't even focus on his penis because of the socks.
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Meeting him up for him to pay half of the Plan B was awkward but worth it cause I'm broke as fuck
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
