I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Those balls look pretty dangerous.
I just turned in a 4 page paper spelling absolute as "absolut" every single time. I'm an alcoholic
I promise you I could read that dogs mind, he was arguing with the other dog saying he knows how fucked up I am
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Sad fact: I'm doing that thing where I'm bored so I give myself Princess Leia hair and drink alcohol.
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
I have got to move on from this "sleeping with every drug dealer I meet" phase.
Randomize
