Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
Oh shit. The kids are pole dancing on a broom. It's like I'm seeing my future offspring before my eyes.
Beer bonged 7 shots of Jameson. I title this night short stories with tragic endings.
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
No. My vagina is not the scapegoat for your poor decisions.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
He brought me Plan B in the snowstorm.
A+ 👏🏼
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
Randomize
