At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
i spent 15 mins trying to take money out of ATM with my drivers license saying, "what the fuckkkk" everytime it didnt work
dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
I think it was a low point but honestly at this point I've had so many that my life is like a valley
pls come over. need ride to hospital once taquitos are ready
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
I KEEP THINKING INAPPROPRIATE SEXUAL THOUGHTS ABOUT YOU AND I AM SORRY.
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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