a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
I think I sprained my soul last night
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
The bald eagles cry cause u drink canadian beer.
But I mean, have you ever just LOOKED at how majestic penises are? They are like ivory columns of pure wonder!
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
I broke my heels and ended up on a random party bus where I passed out after a brief stripper pole incident.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I didn't rip your fishnets, WE ripped your fishnets.
Life if anyone rolls up to my funeral with shitty weed get them out of there
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize