everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Im making the walk of shame with half a box of pizza, its like when youre little and you get a goodie bag leaving the party
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
Can we agree to not tell mom about this?
This isnt even the most disappointing thing i know about you.
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
he's so sweet and its so cute. but I swear to fuck if I let my guard down and this was all a lie I am going to become a serial killer.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
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