I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Okay, we really need to start training for the St Pattys parade. 48 hours of green beer won't end well if we don't prep ourselves. 2 week bender starts now
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
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