I just heard a girl say "We can't go that way, it is a one way street." She was on foot...Nothing worse than girl from the midwest that move to NY to "live out their dream" -the dream of living in a rat and roach infested 200sqft for $2k a month, and get fucked by some recent Ithaca college frat grad...
We just saw a waitress walk by with a tray of bacardi and whipped cream.
Whoever ordered that deserves a pat on the back and the "classiest customer" award
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
If I started a story with "That three-year-old totally deserved it," would you listen?
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
I tipped him really well because I feel he knew we were high, but did it in a non judgemental way.
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
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