OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Like if there was an award for best way to take a girls virginity, he would get a standing ovation. And first prize. Probably a bunch of roses too. That good.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
There were firefighters and a fire truck up the street. I asked what was wrong and their exact words were "Just a tiny explosion; it'll be all right"
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