I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Sometimes your consistent use of proper punctuation makes me nervous D:
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
i have no idea who im with but someones making meatballs. im going to stay.
I think I told some stripper my friend owned Groupon Last night
before the moonshine you were already braiding the bouncers beard -_-
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I'm the kind of girl who misses her mouth when trying to eat, do you honestly think I'm coordinated enough to wear heels during sex?
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
This is not a test of the emergency warning system. He has broken my vagina. I repeat he has broken my vagina. Damn it was good.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
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